That's been my story for years. I hadn't ever seen it work for anyone else, so what made me think I could do it? I don't know why, but I think we all tend to overestimate ourselves in this area. We somehow assume we are capable of changing everything at once (or it's the opposite and we don't even try). Fortunately, through several people wiser than me, I was able to learn a new way of going about it. Give it a try if what you're doing hasn't been working.
1. make a list. Write down all the habits you want to start or stop, in order of difficulty. Having a list has helped me keep track of my progress, as well as motivate me. I have my list on accompl.sh, but paper works well too. I just prefer online because it gives me accountability(anyone can read my list), and is easier to keep track of.
2. create a trigger. If you're trying to start a new habit, a trigger is your reminder. When I started flossing, my trigger was touching my toothbrush. Every time I reached for my toothbrush, I would remember to grab the floss first. If you're trying to stop a bad habit, the trigger is its replacement. When I'm tackling one of those, my trigger is deep breaths or clenching my fist. You can try one of those, or pick something else that's relaxing or enjoyable. It's also important to be very mindful when an urge hits you. Take note of it, and let it pass.
3. start small. Most people fail, simply because they try to tackle multiple things at once or begin with the hardest habit. Doing that will only frustrate and overwhelm you. Look at your list and start with the easiest thing, or the one you are most excited about. Assign a month to each habit on the list, and be careful about getting ahead of yourself. :)
I just love your blog. I've been reading it since you were featured on Miss Minimalist, and it's helped me organize my computer so much. :)
ReplyDeleteThe tips you have here are great for habit building. I also find it very helpful to set rewards up for myself that I get after a certain amount of time practicing the habit. Like, for instance, I told myself that if I ran every day for forty days straight, then I'd buy myself some new running shorts. It's very motivating!
@Caer Glad you have been enjoying it!
ReplyDeleteThat's a great tip too! Haven't tried that myself, but I'm going to keep it in mind. :) That is awesome that you use it for gear. Seems like that would also help the urge to buy new stuff before you know if you're going to stick with the habit. Thanks for sharing!
@Sarah, your response reminds me of the Thoreau quote "Beware of all enterprises that require new clothes, and not rather a new wearer of clothes." JD Roth had a good post on this a few months back on Get Rich Slowly. Like what you're saying, he recommended trying out an activity with whatever you have available for cheap or for free, and making sure you can commit to it before investing more heavily. I'd link to it, but I can't find the article for the life of me.
ReplyDeleteAlso, I really like your idea of listing your new habits in order of difficulty. Not something I had thought about, but sounds like it could give you some "quick wins" to help you stay motivated on the path to change. Great advice!
Thank you for writing this post! I've tried the trigger thing with 2 new habits - using floss and drinking water. I did the same thing with you using the toothbrush as a trigger to pick up the floss, and for water, any time I pick up a utensil to eat a meal, I drink a glass of water first. After a week it's almost become second nature!
ReplyDelete@Corinne That's awesome!! So glad it's helped you.
ReplyDeleteHi Sarah,
ReplyDeleteI am interested to see what the accompl.sh website is all about, might be useful ... although I do like pen and paper.
There will be a huge influx of people wanting to create new habits what with the new year almost upon us, and I think what you are saying is spot on ... People will want to change their eating habits, lose weight, exercise more, do this and that, but unfortunately doing it all at the same time causes us not to achieve any of them.
I myself have been a victim of this time and time again, and even though I have read it in several places I think finally it has sunk in to me ... let us hope this is the case!
Thank you
Jason
Jason,
ReplyDeleteIt's a pretty cool site. Of course, nothing can fully replace pen and paper... but a website does tend to be easier to keep up with.
Right, likewise! Also, when I do make a full resolution list (right before January), I like to assign each month a goal so that I can focus on one thing at a time. Helps a lot.